Dealing with Dad, Alcohol, and possibly Drugs

Because I whine about it so much, I thought I'd make a thread about it so y'all know what's going on. (And why I won't be on when it happens.) I get upset about the shit that he does, and it ends up with me not wanting to talk to anyone.




Dad decided to hire Baggs to mow the lawn, since Dad's back is bad and he needs surgery on it. Well, Baggs came over last night and tried to get the mower and weed-eater working from 6:30 until well after sunset, until we couldn't see the ground beneath our feet. Dad never came home to explain how the stuff worked.

As it turns out, he was out drinking with a friend from work. According to my sister, Mom went out to his work (after Dad had been rejecting everyone's calls) to see if he was there. His car was. No Dad. Well, mom parked somewhere where she could see them, but they couldn't see her. As they pulled up and Dad got into his car, Mom texted him.


Dad sat in his car for a while, looking like he was deciding what to do. He finally decided and drove (drunk) at 80 mph (with mom chasing him) down a maze of country roads. Mom finally gave up the chase and found her way back to the highway to come home.

So I find all this shit out and Baggs is still here, so I tell him what's going on and text Dad.


He didn't reply back until 4 this morning.

I need help, can u help me?

He needed gas, but he'd already gotten it by the time I replied, two hours later.

He's acting like my sister: be a jackass then ask for help when you need it. "Ask Bean, she'll always help. Doesn't matter if I'm being an ass or not."

Seriously, why do I bother? BECAUSE I CARE
Why do I get used? BECAUSE I'M TOO FUCKING NICE
Why don't I say no? IT'S NOT IN MY NATURE
Do I know how to say no? YES, BUT NOT TO MY PARENTS
Why am I talking in caps? I DON'T FUCKING KNOW

Oh bean. I'm sorry this is happening to you. But I don't have much advice other than,

You cannot change people if they do not want to change. You can let them know that, " Hey, you're an ass" but they have to make the ultimate change. If they don't well they see they don't have reason to. I'm sorry. I wish it wasn't like that, Bean, but life stinks sometimes. Try not to worry yourself, because stress can weaken your immune system and get you sick.

Bean,

From the experience of having a more-worthless-than-shit father, may I tell you that he will probably never change. For your sake especially, I hope he does. That'll make one of us lucky... I hope everything works out for you, but all you can do is put up with it for now.